


8 Letters

by toalltheones



Series: A Song For You [2]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Basically Changbin has been hurt before, But Felix still loves him, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Warning: mentions of depression/cutting/suicide!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-06 04:00:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16381001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toalltheones/pseuds/toalltheones
Summary: Felix has been there for Changbin since the day they met, but Changbin has been hurt so many times that he's afraid to open up.





	8 Letters

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING!! Rated for allusions towards depression/cutting/suicide  
> Please read with caution!

 

Why Don’t We – 8 Letters  
<https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3DlM19x4RQ>

_You know me the best_  
You know my worst, see me hurt, but you don't judge  
That, right there, is the scariest feeling  
Opening and closing up again  
I've been hurt so I don't trust  
Now here we are, staring at the ceiling

_-_

It was nearing 5:30am, with some people just starting to wake up to get ready for their early office jobs, yet in a tiny Seoul studio apartment, a small body sat hunched over his desk, furiously scribbling in a notebook in the dim light of a small lamp.

Changbin groaned, ripping the sheet of lyrics out and angrily throwing it at the trashcan. It bounced off the rim and missed, joining countless other balls of paper littering the floor that had accumulated throughout the night. His head hurt and his eyes were bloodshot but he had to get his thoughts out onto the paper otherwise he’d… _._

He squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head as if he could shake the thoughts right out of his head, and he clenched his fist so hard that the pencil in his hand snapped in half. He glared pointedly at the jagged splinters of the pencil, desperately trying but ultimately failing to keep his eyes from straying to the harsh lines that littered his wrist, some old and others still in the process of healing.

It had been at least 2 weeks since he felt the urges but he could feel tears bubbling up his chest and his fingers itching to find something sharp.

As if his distress sent out an alarm, Changbin felt arms wrapping around him from behind, one hand rubbing to soothe the tightness in his chest. A kiss was pressed to the side of his neck and he squeezed his eyes shut, letting an audible sob escape.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed.” The lips on his skin lingered for a second longer before the body pulled away, ignoring Changbin’s protest, and small hands pulled him away from his desk. Changbin threw a longing glance at the notebook on his desk but quickly gave in, letting himself be led to bed.

Changbin let himself be coddled, curling up to the warm body next to him. He closed his eyes, weary and bone-tired, but his dark thoughts were still ricocheting wildly off the walls of his brain.

Plush lips softly kissed the deep furrow between his eyebrows, relaxing his frazzled mind a fraction. “Shh. I can _hear_ you thinking. Just rest.” The deep voice, made even deeper with sleep, helped to quiet the doubts in his mind.

Changbin let out a shuddery breath, forcing himself to think of anything else, and not entirely surprised when his thoughts fell to Felix, the owner of the voice currently singing softly to him.

Felix had come into his life unexpectedly, less than a year ago, having coaxed Changbin away from his precarious spot on the edge of the cliff and spending the rest of the night with him on the beach, talking about anything and everything until the sun rose. Since then, Felix had been a constant presence and Changbin almost couldn’t remember what life was like without the Australian boy. Almost.

Now, Changbin wasn’t naïve and he knew that, despite the other’s angelic personality, Felix couldn’t heal him from his self-destructive tendencies and past hurt but, for the first time in years, he didn’t feel quite so alone. He had someone who believed in him and cared for him, someone to hold his hands when they couldn’t stop shaking and hug him close when he had an episode.

Someone who loved him and who he also, maybe?

He sat up abruptly, turning to face Felix who stared up at him sleepily, eyes curious and concerned, but patiently waiting for Changbin to be ready to speak. He was never pushy, always letting Changbin open up at his own pace.

Changbin’s eyes fell to the constellation of freckles smattering the other boy’s cheeks and his chest began to feel tight again, only this time, with a different feeling.

“I—” His voice caught in his throat, mouth suddenly dry. Clearing his throat, Changbin tried again, “Felix, I—” but he couldn’t bring himself to form the words. Tears sprung to his eyes and he blinked them away rapidly, looking up to lock eyes with the other, who’s eyes had softened and had a fond smile on his lips.

Felix sat up, gently running a hand through Changbin’s hair before kissing him deeply.

“It’s okay. I know.”

-

_WC: 712_

**Author's Note:**

> Stereotypical Changlix fic checklist: smol emo Changbin? Check! Referring to Felix's freckles as constellations? Check!  
> A little more angst for you guys, but I had a happier ending this time!! Regardless, Changlix is my original SKZ OTP and will always have a very special place in my heart (no matter how many times Hyunjin is thrown into the equation bc Hyunjin is for Seungmin!!)
> 
> Thank youuuuuuu to the people who left comments and kudos on my last drabble (it's a Seungjin one, so check it out if you haven't pls!) and I hope you guys like this one!!
> 
> Please leave me comments, constructive criticism, or song recommendations! Thank you ♡
> 
> (P.S. soeihfsldfhsldfjhewjr, I'm DYINGGG, the entire new album is so good and I've had it on repeat the whole day!!!!!!!!!!!


End file.
